Emotional Intelligence

Know thyself

The Ancient Greeks said it best: According to the inscriptions at the famed Temple of Apollo, one of the three pillars of human morality is to “know thyself.” The Greek sages and philosophers knew a fundamental truth: We humans are highly emotional beings. In fact, most of our behavior is driven or at least influenced by our emotions. To build healthier relationships, make better decisions and perform to the best of our abilities, we must be able to first understand our emotions and how they affect our actions, and ultimately learn to manage these emotions – lest they manage us.This skill is commonly known as Emotional Intelligence (EI). Psychologists Peter Salovey and John Mayer defined EI as "the ability to monitor one's own and other people's emotions, to discriminate between different emotions and label them appropriately, and to use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior.”Psychologist and science writer Daniel Goleman developed a model that breaks down EI into five areas:

SELF-AWARENESS

The ability to recognize and understand personal moods, emotions and drives, as well as their effect on others. Indicators of self-awareness include self-confidence, realistic self-assessment and a self-deprecating sense of humor. Self-awareness depends on the ability to monitor one's own emotional state and to correctly identify and name these emotions.

SELF-REGULATION

The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods, and the ability to suspend judgment and to think before acting. Indicators include trustworthiness and integrity; comfort with ambiguity; and openness to change.

INTERNAL MOTIVATION

An inner vision of what is important in one’s life, taking joy in doing something, having the curiosity to learn, and achieving the flow that comes with being immersed in an activity. A propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence. Indicators include a strong drive to achieve, optimism even in the face of failure and organizational commitment.

EMPATHY

The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people. Having the skill to treat people according to their emotional reactions. Indicators include expertise in building and retaining talent, cross-cultural sensitivity, and service to clients and customers.

SOCIAL SKILLS

Proficiency in managing relationships and building networks, and an ability to find common ground and build rapport. Indicators of social skills include effectiveness in leading change, persuasiveness, and expertise building and leading teams.To Goleman, these five areas are not innate talents, but rather learned capabilities that must be worked on. With dedication and practice, these capabilities can be developed to achieve outstanding performance. Goleman believes we are all born with a general emotional intelligence that determines our potential for learning emotional competencies as we grow and mature.